Zen and the Art of Sewing Machine Maintenance

Sometimes I get all caught up in my plans for sewing - my next project, what order I should do my projects in, what techniques I need to try, or look up, or avoid. Sometimes I don't enjoy sewing for sewing's sake. Yesterday as I was puttering around my studio (oh yeah, I'm calling it a studio now) doing things I don't consider actual sewing - pressing freshly washed material, tracing, transferring markings, and cutting out a pattern - I suddenly realized that I was enjoying myself. I was calm. I wasn't worried about how long it was taking me, whether I was off schedule or not. I just listened to a book on CD, pressed, cut and just was a sewer. It was nice. So nice, in fact, that I did it again today. And as a bonus, I will most likely have a new shirt to wear tomorrow as long as I don't linger here online too long.

Maybe this is a new trend I can start - mindful sewing. Why not? There's mindful eating and mindfulness meditation. Here's how you do it: when you press a seam, watch the seam transform into a neat, orderly, straight seam, slightly toasty from your iron. Know that it's stronger and cleaner since you pressed it so lovingly. Don't think about getting it done as fast as you can so you can get on to the next seam. That's how I have sewn before and it gets you nowhere... and you look shabbily homemade when you get there.

Well, back to my studio. The rain and wind are beating at my windows tonight, saying, "go to bed, curl up, and sleep!" But I need a little more sewing zen before I turn out the lights, I think. I want to share yesterday's poem (from the poem-a-day challenge) - I am finally writing poetry again and I am thankful for that small wonder, no matter if my poems are awful or brilliant.

The Lake House

You are back here again
searching for people lost and long gone
for parts of yourself
you just know you left here

Parts you miss
parts your friends ask about,
parts your family wonders about

Who are you now?
Who were you then?
How do you reconcile who you were
when you left
with who you were
while you were away?

They are not here - they stay with you
I am just a shell
a box you fill with parts
lost and found
you take the contents with you
you leave the box behind

Holy Crap, it's April

Well, in my defense, I have been sewing... but not as much as I have wanted to and I certainly haven't been keeping up with my blog. Let's just say a minor (read: major) bump in my personal life has distracted (read: demoralized) me. So without any excuses I'll get back to it. Pictures of the garments I have finished will be posted as soon as I find a willing photographer. I am working on some neat quilting projects to give my sons for Easter so I am taking a week off from sewing for myself.

I am also trying to redeem myself by doing the Poem-a-Day Challenge at the Poetic Asides blog from Writer's Digest (http://blog.writersdigest.com/poeticasides/). Each day you get a prompt and you post your poem as a comment on the blog. I posted my first one today and I'll share it here too (since it's my poem after all!). Today the prompt was to write an origin poem...

the origin of a word

how do words begin?
on the tip of your tongue, right there
but wait – gone now
my son relishes a new word
yelling it, laughing – try it again, again!

I have tried for years now to stop this from coming
this word leaves me cold
leaves me speechless, hopeless
pitiable

this word leaves me where I never thought I would be
who I never thought I would be
I’m that woman, that thing
everyone glances back as they pass by
dear, dear what a shame

this word leaves me here
at the origin of the end
where everyone does their leaving
where everything I know is right here
wait – gone now

Winter Wardrobe 2009

So this might not be as interesting to me as it is to anyone else… but I spent months and months planning this out, so here we go. My inherited stash of material and patterns loomed large, and I was rapidly shedding the baby weight I had gained while pregnant with my first son. So, I pulled out the patterns whose smallest size was my current size – 16, which is roughly a ready-to-wear 12. Side note: sewing is not for the faint of heart. You have to accept the fact that the patterns are 1-2 sizes larger than what you find in the stores. Just think of it this way: clothing manufacturer fat-cats want you to spend money so they make you feel good by slapping a size 12 label on a size 16. You, however, are not a sucker. Be proud and buy patterns by your measurements! Anyway, once I pulled all the patterns that only went down to a 16, I matched fabric to them from my stash and supplemented with some patterns that go all the way from XS to XL. What emerged was a color palette and a wardrobe that was pretty functional for Atlanta winters.

• Easy McCall’s/Sew News 2351 – tank and skirt in teal double knit
• Easy McCall’s/Sew News 2350 – hooded jacket and skirt in black knit
• Simplicity 7905 – short slip dress and short sleeve overdress in black knit and black novelty sheer, respectively
• Kwik Sew 2694 – long and short-sleeve surplice tops in white knit and raspberry sweater, respectively
• Simplicity Millenium 8626 – skirt, pants and knit tunic in purple plaid on bias, purple and black double knit and burgundy sweater
• Easy McCall’s/Sew News 2348 – long jumper and unlined jacket in teal wool woven
• Kwik Sew 2184 – long sleeve rugby, extended into a dress that falls at knee, in a green-purple stripe double knit
• Kwik Sew 2966 View A – long sleeve button down in black-purple leaf print woven
• Kwik Sew 1607 View A – racing-style back swimsuit in a purple/pink print
• Kwik Sew 3206 All Views – purses made from leftover fabrics
• Rucksack – burgundy corduroy
• Simplicity 7457 – lined coat with detachable hood in burgundy wool woven
• “Shrug Your Shoulders” article in white and black double knit
• “Sew RETRO” article with green capri and tan chino

To Hand Stitch or to Stitch Witch?

That is the question. The answer, as it turns out, is to stitch-witch whenever possible. This is the result of recent battle in the war of me versus perfectionism. I sat for a while with a half-finished shirt, debating on whether I should take a short cut and finish the shirt or if I should follow the instructions exactly and hand-stitch the hems and inside-shoulder seams. Shouldn’t I takethe long road and do the hand-stitching? Make my bones, so to speak, in the sewing world? Didn’t mom hand-stitch when she first started to sew? Don’t I have to “earn” the right to utilize tools that make a sewer’s life easier? Won’t I be cheating if I don’t struggle through this pattern? And so I sat and thunk. And thunk some more. In the end – and this is after some genuine soul searching far beyond what the situation called for – I decided to use Stitch Witchery instead of hand stitiching. Honestly, this is a comfort garment, not an elegant evening gown where hand-crafted details would make it a one-of-a-kind piece. And, if Sewing with Nancy can do it, so can I. But this is indicative of what goes on in my head in all aspects of my life: if I can’t do things exactly how I want to, or how the instructions tell me to, or at the right time or with the right materials, or if the planets aren’t aligned… I struggle to start projects, let alone finish them. In my mind, I see myself toiling romantically with needle and thread for years and years until I am a master tailor or some such nonsense. In reality, I want to sew for myself, friends and family and to enjoy it. I need to leave my perfectionism behind and embrace the act of sewing. Or I will never get anywhere.


This skirt and tank turned out to be very comfortable – the tank so much so that I am already noting that if I have another baby I am keeping this top and some of my yoga pants for suuuuper stretchy comfort in the summer months. Since it is winter here in upstate NY I tried the top with a button down blouse underneath… it kind of worked. The model on the pattern paired the tank and skirt with a wide belt below the waist. I do not own a belt anymore (since I went shopping for one after my first son was born and they didn’t make one big enough for me anywhere in the entirety of Perimeter Mall – I have not tried to repeat this horrifying experience since). The skirt is really long – great since I am tall – so I am hoping that I can fit into my knee boots (post-pregnancy calf bloat is a threat). With some tights and boots the skirt could be winter-friendly and cute.


A couple of problems with the construction: I went a little stitch-witch crazy in tacking down the interfacing. I should have stuck with fusing just at the sides – the rectangle shows at the front. I might have to cover it up with a chunky necklace of some kind… but I am accessory-challenged, so one step at a time!

Which is Worse: Self-Doubt or Narrow Hems?

At this point it's difficult to tell... I finally motivated myself to start working on my first pattern (McCall's 2351), but I am running into the usual frustrations.


In order to get myself to start working, I made a number of decisions for this particular project:

1. No serging - I will do this project only using the sewing machine. I have serger thread that matches perfectly, but the thought of translating where I would serge seams and where I would finish edges has me running for the hills right now


2. No pockets - this I remembered after dutifully studying the instructions on pockets for at least an hour. I didn't have enough material for the pockets, so I didn't even cut any out


3. No perfectionism - this whole idea is about learning how to sew well and I can't do that without actually sewing. So when I make mistakes I need to remind myself that mistakes are the point

So those few rules got me actually to put my foot on the pedal and start sewing. A number of my worries came true: the knit material is tricky for me to work with. I wonder at how it was Mom's favorite material use - it is comfortable to wear, but how did she avoid the problems that I am experiencing? Or did she? Did she just get better with practice or was she more patient that I am? Who knows. The material seems to feed unevenly under the sewing foot - the bottom moves faster than the top, so at the end of the seam I have extra material on the top. And don't get me started about these horrible narrow hems! The are at the sides of the tunic-tank and as you can see from the picture, it's not good. Not good at all. The second one looked a little better, but not that much better.

After the narrow hem disaster, I just looked turned out the light and went to bed.

Fear and Loathing in the Sewing Room

I am literally petrified to start this project. I got out the instructions 2 nights ago to browse before I started in on it... and am now paralyzed with self-doubt. A million "can'ts" are running through my head (which is throbbing by the way). You can't work with knits - they get all stretched out, you can't have cut the interfacing out right - it's going to be backwards, you can't figure this hand-stitching out - and you'll never find that article about hand stitches to read up on how to do it right.

So here I sit, in my workroom, trying to persuade myself to just thread my macine. That's it. One little step. One little job. And I know right now that I won't do it. I'll sit and write a while, move stuff around on my desk and call it a night - I'll go to sleep absolutely loathing myself for my fear, weakness, cowardice, laziness. I'll hate myself deep into the wee hours of the morning and wake up just a little more worn out than the day before. Just a little more hesitant, a little more unsure. I'll need to do more planning, more organizing. And then it will be summer and all my plans will move to a year out, then 2 years... all because I can't bring myself to thread a sewing machine. Why? What am I afraid of? If you read my journals as far back as they can take you there is always fear and me not understanding what exactly I fear. Fear of action? Forward motion? Fear of putting my mark on something for all to see? Fear that I won't do it or anything right? I don't know what I fear that stops me from doing and creating. But lately the fear of never doing anything looms a bit larger on the horizon.

The "Why"

My mother was a sewer. She created beautiful things out of raw materials - out of thread, fabric, zippers, buttons, pins and patterns. She was a creator of shirts, skirts, pants, pajamas, prom dresses, stuffed animals, Halloween costumes, coats; of a warm, safe home; of a loving family; of a circle of true friends. Mom died on May 29, 1997 from ovarian cancer. I was 20, my sister 22, my father was 50. We were too young to lose her and she was too young to go.

Among the broken hearts that she left was a massive stash of fabric, patterns, books, magazines and notions. I took these things with me - after an initial weeding - when I got married and moved away. I took her Pfaff and her Babylock. I had a lot of plans to sew - I would pour over the material again and again... but would always dream and not do. I moved all this... baggage from apartment to apartment, from state to state, a total of 9 times. And that's what it had become - sacred baggage, but baggage none the less.

Well, enough is enough. I am no longer dreaming, but doing. I am forceably and publicly unlocking my creativity here - I have fabric, patterns and plans for 2 years - 7 seasons - of clothes. This is a crash course in sewing. Self-taught, self-motivated, and utterly selfish.

So here is where I will document what I learn, what I make... and how many times I try to throw my sewing machine out the window.